yes, of course it’s hard! i like remembering the idea that nothing that is worth while is ever easy. simple, yes, but never easy. i think there is a profound difference between the words simple and easy.
i think the only reason our lives and purposes get convoluted is because our egos get involved and mess everything up. if we listen to our intuition (and, believe me, i instantly think: “intuition? only lucky people get to hear what their intuition has to say…”, when really i think what is going on is that my ego/thoughts/never-ending battle with myself gets in the way and is too loud for me to listen to the intuition that is inside me), i mean REALLY listen to it and HEAR it, then life is simple and complete. like in making art. we’re learning to get ourselves out of the way and listen to what’s coming through us to put on the paper. why can’t we recognize that it’s the same in our lives? if we just get out of the way and listen, then all will be well. but i forget all this in a split second…… maybe that’s what i mean about it all being a process. a process of becoming aware.
question: where did we pick up the idea that if we can’t do or ‘get’ something immediately, we’ll never get it? isn’t that incredibly self-defeating? how can we allow outselves to just BE! this is what’s hard for me. the real thing that gets in my way is judgment/expectation of myself….
as for the layers, i think there are things we are each probably ashamed of in our pasts, and that makes it hard to live from the heart, too. it’s not fun to be honest about past mistakes, but what if we just tried to not take it so seriously? we’re human!! we all make mistakes!! what if we said “hooray! we’re learning something in this life!” and let the layers fly? what would THAT feel like? (yikes…!)
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